Just before i get back to the most poignant possible pictures...
Which 'ceased'
with the picture of a library a few weeks ago, I haven't yet got to in the 'sequence' - there is always a sequence... the poets cannot know as I have studied them and they are so full of sugary self pity;
There is only poetry in making something from nothing. And no hope. And certainly no moaning, ever, no matter how mindfuckingly poignant (oh the way she said that 'm' word....who was that? too much happens in my life when i wish nothing at all, only stillness, as now....since way way way before dawn...
Now....this is what it WAS mindfuckingly ...about....
But there's only ONE ghood bit.....where the. one assumes, dusky ladies come in with their "dance......"
shivvers up the spine even if far too sat-down.... for a dance...
but love means no matter what, luv....
And bad childhood attachments - the key to all going uptits, means the fuckwits of youtube ... cannot even manage to tell me a few hours ago that the act of pure love (ongoing) is suspended because after reaching my upload limit they cannot even program their silly little windows to say "start again matey".....no they are just stuck.
But forget about them and the bad poets all them moaners even mister Nobel imself....
Moan....
There is only one key to life which is to do the... work... idyllic communist style work which is who gives a toss about money or hours, or days of work....you jkust work in sequence...when the time is right.
And the weather.
But most of al the energy.
And even if it is hard to put without seeming insane, nope.... energy and sequence mean the same - even if you get a message from the only woman in the world you feel genuinely you could....and did.....love... nope....don't open it until I (that should be in big font with flashing neon)
am...ready....
until it is kairos time....
soon...
No one can write poetry about that as it is poetry in motion, or indeed inaction...
And is the only action or inaction in life that is truly beautiful.
So, nothing happened, as of a few weeks ago. Here i mean...and there is nothing worse than someone with a bad internet connection thinking in any way they ..matter..
Or should be pondered or given a millisecond of attention...
Unless they really do have something mindfuckingly tragi-beautiful, to show...
That isn't made up. And anyone else would have died from it's so ....sorrowful.
Which is my job, sharing such unpitiful FACT... fact Rachel fact..
Life is only fact everything else is you assuming bollocks in your digital masturbation
(oh Penny....she was wrong but one never has the time, as Neruda so wisely said "a conversation does not begin until we have been speaking an hour"....no the people are not stuck in 'fear', they just don't know there are only two states, the first being being fairly stuck and lost and extremely rarely 'fearful' - ask Ms Ginsberg the great writer..., and the second, post losing ...well i heard yesterday how she too lost her daughter that's why a decade back she had so little to say to me and i did love her ... post fuckery others call ridiculous words like the trendy 'trauma' or vulnerability - that doesnt even dignify parentheses as it has just become a club.... post true loss, you are in stage two of life.... the only other stage there is. And you don't go back to that other, which is far lowert a stage - yopu can see nothing over the heads of the noisy ones in the front... on that higher stage heck you wobble maybe even have vertigo for years.....but my my how much further back into the bowels of it all, you do see...
and making that poetry...
well maybe they dont think there is money
innit..
in other words poets are lowest common denominator prostitutes...
so we better try and rejig poetry... that's a bit grandiose. Almost committable...(loony, yellow van stuff.... hahh hahh i met Ms Denbigh yesterday what a day!)
But you see i have my...'tapes'...
Oh my they are good...
The best is just for me a day on a plane...
Maybe one day we go there.
But for now...
Before i return to the actual project which is so mindfuckingly poignant imagery from about seven years ago to about a month ago....
Even if Ms digital ...well i was rather surprised but i know what i want...
And why...
Yesterday. There is a whole lifetime of ... well an actual good poet who doesn't need the greatest backing singers ever in history to prop him up....carry him...neigh make him ...
And after a decade or more of being a tad "Jewish" to actually quote my Jewish real friend so i didn't say that....
And adamantly footstamping his way to making more money out of the greatest backing singers except Roberta and Axl's other one...
And at last in this glorious year of paradise poignancy when...i even got a fuck off message from her last night....no doubt...
In the most paradise year in history when even yestereve the barman (one beer a year) in Wales said "this getting fuckin Nazi.." hahhh hahhh what gloriousness....
Except last year...
Due to her smile even if her mum doesnt include me in the Crimbo drink any more...
maybe just because i asked her something you only ask of someone you really do value and...trust..
Anyway ...at last after years of it being blocked off The Tube and one has to pop obver to Dailymotion, he relents.....
"wheels off and burn.." Pen... wheels off and burn...
But that's not poetry...
Thuis is even if first hurried draft,
yesteraft as I am roaming the aisles of the Oop....
looking for yellow labels or are they orange..
He calls.
A month after his phone slamming down.
A man of not only higher 'religion'. But also a many year aficionado of the bard he once slagged of for his co-self identification 'type'....
being mean when Zeppelin and everyone else that mattered for years had let it all up for free except Hendrix' daughter for some curious reason...
bit of a surprise
Meant to be 'wise'
offers cash
offers food
but how can a man not be of the ...
mind
To know that once he was asked
Asked the wrong word
For
all i wished indeed was if i popped mine clogs you would be the one
to have a word
All was well
fear not
and a friend, so so many hours in chat and debate
so many years - well near on ten actually
that a friend of the cloth
(for cash) or one should say treasurer at his local 'Temple'
and The Bard
Someone who listens to that so called 'Bard'
cannot understand what a compliment that is
Cannot understand it is all one man
wants from one man
when he has grown up.
" I changed my bank..."
"no need my friend anyway i have never had more than i have today..."
That one invests so so much in so much of someone and never mind them not even realising what a true compliment it is asking them to be official witness, they don't even understand how complimentary that always was.... and that they
Well, pride is a funny word.
Was it pride that had him call?
Was it some bizarre setting that is forget the past no matter what
and pay off ones past sins even if they were not
according to him
who cannot listen
"i would not have one millisecond of my life other
than it is
because only the way it was and
is
is why i found even a lesson and poetry in ...
that ultimate Wasteland in your ...
well what is it, Judas...denied his so called boss thrice....fuckin fairytales...
that from you is so so much better and furthermore it is real and
in the Vault thrice
No matter what.
Back to only pictures any moment now.....
except one small problem being 'young' not that i wish to remain so is about every day awaking and knowing there are half a dozen utterly wonderful completely different things that just possibly could happen..
when yestermorn there were absolutely no things at all ever going to happen again..
But never ever moaning about either.
And only one poet really doesn't ...ever...
And all through the glorious paradise times from March the twentyfifthish twenty twenty in the year of oh lord i have the planet to myself... who gives a fuck about them any more...if they wish to sulk....and then ALL these new fiends here in the middle of nowhere....
.. and every second since....,
One's ...hymn....
well except for Tammy
"Tammy ... our joint goddess... Her Minnieship..... i have road tested your 1990 which means a thousand luistens walking the hills all the rest of the fuckwits moaning below.... i cried yesterday on the thousandand oneth listen.... because Tammy you.... you really were i have now decided .... you were BETTER than her..... I mean it was impossible to ever find anyone better than her .... ever. and in the year of our Lordless travelling but one date only..... i get mine with the Actual Queen...."
